Frustrated. Confused. Ecstatic. Trying to remain in control. Annoyed. Wondering where it’s going to go from here. It’s business time. Sometimes, I can’t stop staring. Not really sure what I want. Scared. I’m different. Is it too much? Want to cut down. No I don’t. New car shopping! It’s getting bad because I’m starting to miss her. It’s not the her you think. Or is it? I wish I were made of money. Growing up and all the responsibilities that come with it. It was a nice weekend. That was a nice feeling. I love it when I hear it. I can’t help by smile sometimes. I hope you don’t notice. Or maybe I hope that you do. Low self esteem. Busy. Juggling. Not over it? GTA. BSG. COD. TV. These are the acronyms that possess my life. Perhaps some distance is needed. W is visiting soon!
Whoa there tiger, relax yo’self. My 070707 girl. Strange pangs. Loneliness vs. jealousy. Marriage. Weddings. Faces from the past. Awkwardness around said faces. Giving up and enjoying life. I hope you’re ok. I can’t believe I deleted that song. Maybe you should rethink things. Mace Windu and Wampu. Cute little kids. Shark’s fin soup. Dude, stop being her bitch. What’s going on with me? I hope I get that job. Ditching responsibilities. I notice more lingering looks. All punched out. Talking more. I hate answering the same question over and over. I wonder what you’re doing, and maybe even what you’re thinking. Hello sunshine. I hate pimples. To attempt the “rainheart tan” or not. I kinda miss you, you mean a lot to me. Am I on my way to being an asshole? Jumping to conclusions. Conflicting feelings. My future and my life. Scary and weird laughter. Super furry animals. Stars revisited. A little horny. Resolutions. Feeling blah. Ikea-fying my room. Living up to expectations. Failure. That feeling I get when I let myself think about things.
The other day, I felt like changing my AIM profile. At first, I started looking for lyrics that were apropos to my life. But then I got lazy after 5 minutes of failure. Then I scoured IMDB for ‘memorable quotes’ from the last 3 movies I’ve seen. Seeing as they were all chinese movies, it was a rather stupid idea. Exasperated, I threw together a slapdash list of things going through my head; ‘blips on my radar’ so to speak. I really liked it. Like a lot. So here it is:
my life companions. graduation pangs. saying goodbye. never being a two minute walk away from all my friends at four in the morning ever again. growing up. the “real” world. hate. my high-ass emotional iq. my cynicism. how i used to be “cool” on xanger. writing about how i really feel about life, the universe, and everything. and not letting you see it.
I guess the last part doesn’t really apply to the 3 (hopefully now 4) readers of this blog. But yeah. I think I’m gonna keep this blips thing up. It’s like a snapshot of my mind. That’s fucking awesome (if you ask me).
» I did not get my ear pierced. Ha.
» I hate it when life goes swimmingly and then suddenly spirals out of control.
» I hate having to overanalyze shit.
» I enjoy profound conversations about life with my peoples.
» I am grateful for those that take my venting, and sympathize.
» I am grateful for those that take my venting, and tell me to stfu.
» I am grateful for all my friends.
» I hate waiting by the phone.
» I hate trying to survive on 28 hours of sleep a week.
» I wish I could have a good night’s sleep.
» Harold and Kumar is the funniest movie ever.
» Collateral wasn’t so bad.
» Going to see Garden State tomorrow. Damn you Jerry.
» Sometimes I wish my life would just go away and leave me alone.
» I enjoy the late night phone conversations with my peoples.
» I miss all my peoples who all went away to hick country, USA.
» I wish they would come back soon.
» I like laying down on the futon on the floor and losing myself in the music.
» I wish that God would answer my prayer.
» Life would be the best ever if He did.
» I only have 2 weeks left in NYC.
» I’m gonna miss everybody.
» Even you.
» My best friend kinda hates me.
» It makes me sad.
» I’m not really metrosexual, I just front like I am.
» Just kidding.
» I am gaining an appreciation for jazz. Slowly.
» I like having a car. I’m gonna miss it.
» I hate how the little things make me go crazy.
» I hate that I’m weak.
» I’m looking forward to people visiting me next year.
» I kinda can’t wait to graduate.
» Sometimes I feel so alone.
» I don’t like how vulnerable this list is making me feel.
» But I’ll suck it up.
» I hope my life will get better.
