clear rants

The decision has been made.

Now all I need to do is follow through.

Wish me luck.

My week beats your year.

Peace, Love, and my last “Peace, love…” ending,
Clear Pants Rainheart

I think that the most interesting thing about such situations is that no matter how sure you are, there’s always that tiny bit of doubt that keeps things mysterious and intriguing.

Yeah, I’m just trying to make myself feel better about things. Don’t drag me down with your nay-sayings and party pooping.

Remind me again why I can’t? I seem to have forgotten all the reasons why. I mean, aside from the obvious one.

But somehow, that reason just doesn’t seem good enough anymore.

I can already feel it starting to slip away. I had thought that maybe I had reached another plateau in maturity, only to find myself once again tumbling down the shifty cliffs of Mt. Emotion. I thought I could keep it under control. For once, everything was going swimmingly. I was enjoying the finer points of life, without any of the drama that had so often besought my poor existence. But alas, it was somewhat short-lived. The control I was so proud of (perhaps too proud) has begun to slip away. The once-familiar (and much unwelcome) feelings have begun to creep up again.

And there goes my boring life. It’s back to the oh-so-familiar drama for me.

I’m still weak as hell though. I’m too thick-headed when it comes to learning lessons.

1. When exactly did “should’ve” become “should of”? Just because they sound the same does not imply equality. Should of doesn’t even make any sense. That’s like me saying “I have and a clue what you’re talking about.” Close enough, but not quite. Not quite at all.

2. At what age do we stop getting hong baos? Just to clarify for those of you who don’t understand the question: Hong baos are little red packets filled with money that we Chinese people get every so often. Are we too old to get them now that we’ve graduated from college? Or does this monetary blessing last until we get married? Hong baos are my only income man. I need them.

And the quote:
“Waaa, you actually are really fat!! You look so much fatter from this angle. You need to stop eating.” –My mom as she pauses momentarily outside my room to stare at my obesity.

Peace, Love and stupid questions,
Clear Pants Rainheart

The other day, my mom snuck up on me as I was IMing. She asked, “Can you teach me how to chat so I can do it at work? All I do is email back and forth.” Panic slowly set in as I imagined her reading my profile, my away messages, and (gasp) even my xanger. I quickly stammered, “Uh, I don’t think you should be chatting at work.” “Oh,” was her reply. I was saved.

But seriously, can you imagine your parents checking your away messages, profiles, and xangas? Ok, I know a couple of you out there whose parents regularly check your xangas (my sincerest sympathies to you) and even those who check your away messages. I remember one of my friends left an away message: “Doing what I do every Friday night, getting drunkkkk!!” To her dismay, when she got home, her mom IMed her, “Oh, thats very interesting.”

Ouch. I think I’d die if my parents started checking up on me online.

On a totally unrelated note, don’t you hate it when you’re filling out a form online, and you have to fill in the special, uber distorted “code” to proceed? The word is always freaking impossible to read. And I end up having to guess and re-enter the code again. That’s just annoying and inefficient.

Ok this entry sucked. Sucks for you.

Peace, Love and crappy entries,
Clear Pants Rainheart

Sorry for all the lame posts lately. I bet nobody cares about my shotgun updates, because frankly, you have no idea what I’m talking about. So I finally got off my lazy ass, and put together a couple of pictures for you to drool over. This is only a small selection of the events of the past month, if you want to see more pics or the videos (live 8 and fireworks), email me or something. But yeah, here’s a bunch of eye candy fo’ ya viewing pleasure (click pics to enlarge).

Cornell Graduation BBQ: June 3, 2005

Church Graduation BBQ: June 10, 2005

Independance Day Weekend: July 1-4, 2005

M’s house in Jersey with K. Grocery / general “old people” shopping. Dinner at Prospectors. Driving around looking for alcohol. Jenga w/ M’s bro and K. M’s friends arrive. “Adult” all-nighter conversation with M and K. Wake up at 4am to head to Live8. Arrive in Philly with a party of 10 at 6am. Wait and bake for 6 hours for the concert to start. Effing awesome concert: Will Smith performs the theme to Fresh Prince, Jay-Z’s last performance ever, etc. Heat exhaustion, free condoms, and the best Coke ever. Spray from the fire trucks. Dinner at the Continental. Passing out at D’s house. Passing out at M’s house. Brunch with the family <3 (thanks for cooking girls!) Train ride home with N. Meet up with J and A and shop all day. Penang. Passed out at home. Met up with J, J and A and ate at Jackson Hole. Stroll by Central Park. Flea markets are only open on the Weekends. Met up with T. Stroll from NoHo to Midtown. “St. Denis” Met up with A. A loves her lightning bolts. Looking for alcohol and other miscellaneous groceries. Head to M’s apt to see the fireworks. Best. Fireworks. Ever. T gets drunk. Took J and J home. Passed out.

Peace, Love, and super fun times,
Clear Pants Rainheart

…because I’m too lazy to elaborate.

Sunday: Slept all day.
Monday: 5 hour interview + 3 hours driving = 1 pooped little boy.
Tuesday: Exploring the city with W.
Wednesday: War of the Worlds with W, J, M, and NC.
Thursday: Shopping with J.
Friday - Sunday: Live 8 in Philadelphia with my peepos.
Sunday - Monday: NS’s gonna stay over a couple days!

Oh yes, I am a busy busy bee.

Peace, Love, and fun times,
Clear Pants Rainheart